"Tantra or the cult of ecstasy is a spiritual path based on the mystical experience of the game rather than on rigid dogmas. In Tantra, the act of love becomes sacred, a cult and an act of worship and devotion. It is a gift of life. Tantric art, tantric writings and rituals glorify the erotic act. Tantra proclaims life in its entirety and teaches the practitioner to discover the spark of divinity inside of us. The Tantric practitioner uses his or her senses, mind and soul in order to reach the peaks of mystical ecstasy." (Kamala Devi )
During the past years there has been a lot written and discussed on Tantra. However, only few know it is an oriental spiritual system whose main purpose is to unify the opposites at all levels.
In Tantra, man and woman are seen as expressions or mirrors of the macorcosmic energies represented by Shiva , or the masculine principle, and Shakti , the feminine principle, under any form these may appear.
Balanced union between the two opposites poles feminine, Yin and masculine, Yang will finally lead to the eliberation of the human being from the endless cycle of births and rebirths and more than that, to God.
The man and the woman have a huge potential, practically they have potentially inside themselves all the possibilities and all the experiences of the world. When they are re-united, these experiences are revealed in a new vision and cosmic harmony that lies at the basis of the whole creation.
Tantra may re-unify an ancient scindation in the inner structure of the people, between sexuality and spirituality, which is very common in the Western tradition. One cannot meet the perfect harmony between sexuality and spirituality elsewhere than in Tantra.
It is a spiritual path that integrates the erotic act as a sacred act, which brings the devoted practitioner closer and closer to God.
In order to facilitate such a union on all levels, Tantra uses a great variety of principles, techniques and rituals. We will introduce you to the most representative and significant ideas that lie at the foundation of Tantra.
Tantra does not contradict the Christian religion, and it can offer the modern stressed and overloaded person an easy manner to improve one’s life, to be happier, to be at peace with one’s own self and with the people around, and also very important to experience the erotic act deeper, longer and more intense.
It is necessary that some taboos concerning sex be demystified because they are the cause of so many inhibitions that keep us from enjoying our exploration of it.
Many of us are unconsciously slaves to erroneous attitudes towards sex. Without the attempt of transforming them, there are very little chances to remould our erotic life.
1. THE INTERCOURSE DOES NOT MEAN PROCREATION
Many people consider that the erotic function of the human being is procreation, and not pleasure and even spiritual evolution. This makes some people to sink in guilt every time they have a fulfilling erotic experience.
Think about yourselves, how many times you made love up to now. A 43-year-old man told us that he made love approximately 3.000 times. For procreation, it would have been sufficient once. Then what did he do the rest of 2.999 times and to what purpose?
The role of Tantra is to "fill" up these empty, missing spots, teaching you how to move from procreation to ecstasy.
2. THE INTERCOURSE IS NO SHAME
The attitude condemning eroticism comes from a wrong tendency of separating the body from the spirit. In this vision, sexuality is the libido, the instinct beyond control. From this comes the tendency to repress sexuality, which is nonetheless a very dangerous tendency, according to psychologists.
Even today, after the so-called sexual revolution of the 60’s, this bizarre, repressed attitude generates inner conflicts and casts shadows over our feelings on the erotic act.
Tantra reveals thus new paths of access to the erotic experience, paths in which Tantra is honoured as a celebration, an act of creation, an art.
3. THE INTERCOURSE IS NATURAL, THEREFORE DO NOT BLOCK OR HINDER IT
The folk traditions say: "When it’s hot it’s hot. When it’s not hot, it’s not hot." Do not resist your inner impulses; do not resist your libido. Let it live and find its expression. Nature knows best.
Frequently people consider that introducing certain specific techniques into one’s sexual life equals to a decrease in spontaneity. However, the way in which we manifest our sexuality is not as natural as it may seem on a first look. It is strongly influenced by the cultural and educational conditions.
For instances ideas such as: "men prefer blondes" or "the greatest orgasm is ensured by a huge penis" are definitely influencing our reactions during lovemaking.
These thoughts are the results of the society in which we live and they influence our entire intimate life. The greatest part of our erotic responses is made of mere learned, acquired responses.
We often tend to react automatically based on subconscious accumulations, due to our experiences, parental conditionings, and education.
Tantra teaches us to transform and decode the responses of our bodies while making love. This is not just a formal practice; it is a preparation for being able to make love in a genuine manner.
After you had learned these techniques, you will discover that you will be able to integrate them effortless in your love life and your spontaneity and naturalness remain unharmed.
4. NO TABOOS IN LOVEMAKING
A reader of our web magazine wrote that after a number of years she succeeded in having an orgasm through masturbation, yet the doctor told her this is an unhealthy thing. For many people, especially women, the influence of the "experts" in the field has created "rules" in how to obtain pleasure.
Tantra dissolves all these distinctions. In Tantra, there are no "wrong" ways of experiencing orgasm, nor wrong ways of making love. However, we need to make it very clear that Tantra does not imply homosexuality, or any perversions that might cross one’s mind.
It is a healthy attitude supported on powerful and precise principles. Tantra simply eliminates any wrong mentalities or attitudes. It teaches us to believe in ourselves and to discover our uniqueness and originality in our eroticism.
It teaches us that orgasm is not a sexual event, but that it may get to the whole body, mind, heart, and spirit.
5. THE ORGASM DOES NOT MEAN EJACULATION
Many people were thought to believe that orgasm is something that refers to the genitals only. Someone, after years of erotic experiences, noted that "after all the sexy movies that I saw, after all the techniques and vibrators that I used, my sex life has not changed notably, and it did not acquire a clear sense either. It was still the ejaculation of the seminal liquid in the vagina."
Consequently, one needs to suffer a change in the vision on sex and eroticism, rather than simply a change of sexual technique. One needs to understand deeply the unbreakable relationship between sexuality and spirituality.
6. THERE IS ANOTHER WAY OF LOOKING AT THESE THINGS
Tantra says that the erotic act is not limited to sexual intimacy. The whole body may be transformed, not literally of course, into an erogenous area, offering a multitude of sensual experiences that will refine and expand gradually.
The genital orgasm is a first step. The next is ecstasy. One needs to understand that orgasm is different from ejaculation.
Although many men await impatiently the ejaculation, they do not know that they may still experience orgasm without ejaculating and that if they last on the orgasmic plateau for sufficient time, this may propel them into exceptional states of mind, soul, and spirit.
In the absence of this understanding, the erotic game stays in the frustrating limit of several minutes of pleasure, ending up suddenly in a sensation of exhaustion and nostalgia of what just occurred.
It is no wonder that in time some women develop aggressiveness, irritation, and frustration. Tantra develops a tender, larger, and deeper perspective on sexuality.
7. THE EROTIC ACT IS NOT A SIMPLE EXCITATION
Many men wrongfully consider that it is enough to kiss and stimulate a woman’s breasts and clitoris (in the happy case) in order to arouse her.
Similarly, there are women who kiss and touch the man’s penis and expect to obtain an erection from the "Ever-Ready Gentleman" in a matter of minutes. Because of this simplified mentality, sexuality is centred on few "hot areas".
Nonetheless, Tantra indicates that the whole body, hands, hips, thighs, neck, and feet are capable of unsuspected erotic sensations. Each part of our body may become almost as "hot", open, and sensitive as the genital area, each with its characteristic.
Tantra indicates that the preparation for the erotic act is not a matter of physical stimulation, but one of mental, emotional, and spiritual harmony.
8. OUR PLEASURE DOES NOT DEPEND ON THE OTHER ALONE
The belief according to which we depend on the other who would be entirely responsible for our erotic fulfilment is also a myth. It is based on the erroneous assumption that the source of our pleasure is not within us, but in the other, and that the pleasure depends and is the result of our lover’s actions.
Tantra explains that we alone are responsible for the pleasure we feel and this is the first and very important step in learning the art of ecstasy.
A person who develops the skills to experience orgasmic states even alone and not necessarily through masturbation or sexually related techniques, is spontaneously attractive to other people as well, and consequently is more apt to find a suitable lover to explore together the elevated eroticism.
9. THE TANTRIC VISION DOES NOT REJECT ANYTHING
All experiences belonging to a person are not judged from the point of view of bad or good, but as an opportunity of learning. Learning according to its rules, of course, and these rules include sexual continence and a healthy heterosexual relationship.
Tantra stresses the importance of HOW you do things, not necessarily of WHAT you do. The Tantric vision is unifying, embracing everything, because any circumstances are considered and looked upon as new opportunities of learning and improving.
For this, sexuality is an extraordinary chance of integrating all aspects that define us, including those parts that we usually rejected and hated. This vision also admits that inside each adult there is a natural aspect of child, who may explore any unknown territory, with innocence and spontaneity.
Tantra offers practical answers to fundamental questions: "what is ecstasy, how can one reach ecstasy, how can one reach ecstasy in the present cultural context, and how can it help us in our daily life?"